This was my first real presidential debate. I didn't know it would be so emotionally charged, so full of self-importance, so integral to my 'breaking out' and being more politically charged and educated about what the candidates are discussing. Yes, I'm also a little bit emotional about the whole thing, but call me the drama queen of the political debates and you'll get what's coming to you ;-)
For years, I avoided the entire spectrum of politics. I was young, thinking that nothing I did really mattered at the polls, that both sides are basically the same - evil, corrupt, full of self-importance and not really standing for anything necessary - like saving the world from itself. While the environment we live in fell apart before my eyes, it always seemed that the politicians were somewhere else, playing some other game while real tragedy and horror continued to smother all life on earth. Corporations, greed, and human ignorance were wiping out the beauty and natural wonder of the earth, while its leaders fiddle-fucked around, played politics, shook their cocky little heads and evaded all of their real responsibilities to the human race.
I thought I was an anarchist, and so I tattood myself with symbols of anarchism and played the whole punk scene like I was some sort of educated dropout. While it felt vindicating, because I was hormonally-driven and prone to fits of anger and resentment toward the world of adults (which wasn't entirely misplaced), in the end anarchism was a fruitless effort (if you could call it an effort) for me. While the idea is often tittilating and luscious, especially after a night of watching all 3 mad max movies back-to-back, ultimately it fails to be an ideal that can exist in this overestimated reality.
At one time, the Libertarians seemed to have a thing going for me (they sent enough snail mail, that's for sure). While I am a champion of more equal rights, less political power over the lives of its subjects and what they put into their bodies, and more environmental policies, it appears that the majority is suckered by the two-party system. And as much as I'd like to continue to support the libertarians (I voted libertarian in the 2000 election, and we got Bush), I have thus bought into the idea that Bush is the greater evil, and therefore Kerry needs all the help he can get.
It's an easy buy; it appears to be true, but I know in my 'heart of hearts' (as Bush likes to say) that this is not always a good reason to vote the other way. One honestly should vote what their heart and mind calls them to do, no matter the odds. If America's about anything at all, it's about taking risks, embracing personal visions and manifesting them in the world. I know that if I vote Democrat just to keep the Republicans out, I'm going suffer the slings and arrows of the democratic party and their not-so-much-better antics. So fucked if you do, fucked if you don't. It seems as much.
However, after tonight, something really nags at me and tugs. Kerry was on form, and he kept the president constantly on defense. This is a great sign for me; it shows that Kerry really has his shit together, that he is truly interested in knowing what's going on and at least presenting creative solutions. He has outsmarted his enemy without resorting to underhanded tactics (not too many, comparatively speaking). He knows his material and doesn't sound like a broken record discussing his ideas. He can talk without going into spasms. Kerry doesn't have nearly as many freudian slips as Bush does. And ultimately, the guy just looks better when he talks. While Bush did nothing but repeat himself and turn several shades of pink throughout the night, Kerry kicked back, was simply cool but not too easygoing. He was smart and sly, and he didn't take any shit from the master of spin who is our current president.
Republicans have always represented the most vile aspects of politics (in my opinion), and Democrats just never resonated with me, simply because rarely can I find a difference between the two parties. In addition, voting Democrat in Oklahoma seems rather pointless. If I really wanted a democratic vote to count, I'd move to a more politically-divided state. Or so it feels once the results of the electoral vote come through.
Oklahoma - where we always vote republican for the president. Oklahoma, where oil money runs deeper than the blood of the indians we've massacred here. Oklahoma, where the biggest act of domestic terrorism occurred, but everybody stays pretty laid back. Oklahoma, where one of the largest tornados in recorded history wiped out hundreds of homes and people not too many years ago. Oklahoma, where apparently nothing interesting ever happens and the people are so laid back - much like our Texas president - all knowing, all opining, all shouting the same old tired mantras that our president keeps chanting. Yup, aw shucks, it's good to be simple where things are so simple.
The simple answers are rarely the correct ones. It's easy to give a 'yes man' solution to everything, and as long as 'we' can get a lot of plainer folks to agree with us, the more credibility our presentation receives. That's the impression I get with Bush. And in just looking at his eyes, I get a creepy feeling that I can't trust him any more than I can trust the constant lies and innuendo that are being sloshed out by the bucketloads. The media is too kind to Bush. And too many people get a pitiful chuckle out of his language barrier, when we really shouldn't be pitying him at all. After all, he's made it this far!
I'm looking forward to the remaining debates, and I really hope Edwards corners Cheney and really digs into the Haliburton 'conflict of interest' issue. Meanwhile, I suppose I ought to be content with the headlines for the next few days. I'm sure they will tell a much different story than the one witnessed tonight on C-Span. After all, they rewrite history at the flick of the wrist, anyhow.
Well, getting sleepy. Been a lonnnngggggg day!
posted by novachild @ Thursday, September 30, 2004,
